Feeling rather sad and weepy today, the heavy grey skies mirrors my mood however that will not stop me getting out into the garden to prune and tidy up my climbing roses before the harsh winter weather takes over.. such feelings are best acknowledged then told where to go before they take up too much head space.
Guess to feel sad is utterly normal after such a heavy week with all the mixed emotions that the doctor's initial diagnosis of deafness for little Angel brings into our lives. We took them to a soft play yesterday afternoon and while the eldest got busy socialising and playing chasing and jumping games little angel toddled around doing his own two year old things, mostly involving balls. Granddad nearly wept though when he lay down in the football area and two older children starting pelting him with balls and he just lay there....
We have all been looking at him through different lenses, even big brother (four years old) has seemed much gentler and more tolerant with him to mum and me, perhaps some of his roughness came from his frustration at not being able to communicate and play with him like other two year olds.
One huge positive is that dear daughter discusses it all with us and welcomes the research and information I pass on to her, I try to not overload her so as yet have only printed off http://www.ndcs.org.uk/family_support/understanding_your_childs_hearing_tests/index.html which neatly explains all the likely tests for deafness in young children. She obviously read it thoroughly as she mentioned the one sentence that mentions preauricular pits, little holes just like little angel has just in front of his ears - further research (googling) found that "Infants with preauricular skin tags or ear pits are at increased risk for permanent hearing impairment" so hopefully this will be a big clue to his diagnosis and treatment options.
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